In my opinion, Comcast is perhaps the single greatest threat to life in the universe.
Now, I fully admit that I do work for cable, but seriously? A few years ago Consumerist visitors rated Comcast the worst company in America – AS BP WAS MARINATING EVERYTHING IN THE GULF IN QUAKER STATE.
Let’s keep some perspective. The tobacco industry KILLS its customers on a daily basis. The coal industry is actively trying to choke us ALL to death, but Comcast is the worst.
Why?
If Comcast COMPLETELY fails you, you might have to talk to your girlfriend/wife for a few hours. Is she really that bad?
For me, subjectively, Comcast has been one of the WORST consumer experiences I’ve ever had. First off they’re expensive when you think about how cheap data transfer is. That’s just the starter.
Comcast sent out a third party cable installer. The process took days and they missed at least two appointments. But hey “it’s not Comcast’s fault” right?!?!
Did they do a good job installing the cable? Nope. Horrible job. Cables everywhere but where I need them. 30 foot cables in places I’ll never need and extremely short cables in the most logical places…but again “it’s not Comcast’s fault.”
Then they try like bloody hell to make me just get a few cable channels. Fine I’ll get a few cable channels if that’s the ONLY way I can get 50 mbps.
Do I get 50 mbps? Nope! Best I’ve ever gotten is 4. Four mbps!!! Not 5, not 6, not 25, not 35, not 45….certainly not 50…the highest speed I’ver EVER clocked is 4 mbps…even though I pay for 50 and buy cable channels I don’t want just to do so.
Oh look it’s the once in a blue-moon and my girlfriend wants to watch the Grammies. Do we actually get the cable channels they FORCE me to buy? Nope!
So I call customer service to get my cable working. Do they send someone out? Nope! They just try to talk to me on the phone over how the cables should be setup over and over and over again. The cables are set up correctly. I connect cables for a living basically. I even tried it “backwards” when they had me on the phone cause they were convinced I had the cables incorrect. Do they send someone out now? Nope!
They send me to a goddamn survey! Why? So they can data-mine me. Why? So they can figure out how to get my money which they are already getting. a god-damn survey??!?! When I want customer service? For a service they are FORCING me to get?!?!
Does it end there? Nope!
Once a month on a Saturday I wake up to a knock on my door well before 11:00 am. Oh look it’s the Comcast door-to-door salesman (or sometimes a saleswoman). What do they want? To sell me Comcast!! Thanks for waking me up you f*cks….I already send you all my money every month. See you again in four weeks cause you NEVER take me off your god-damn list of people to sell to.
Does it end there?
Nope!!!!
Every time I return to my computer my computer wants to sign on the Xfinity “free wi-fi” that they’ve set in my apartment complex to try and increase their brand awareness. Is it a good network? Nope! It’s a piece of shit. Do I have to take time to sign off and re-sign on to the network I already pay for? You betcha!!!
So no, Comcast isn’t trying to kill me, but if you aren’t aware that cigarettes are harmful by now I think that’s beautifully darwinian.
Oh give me a break. I suppose that Comcast isn’t just about the greatest thing since my great-aunt Winifred told a rather off-color joke at dinner one evening, I must say. It seems these two fellows of differing religions were entering a drinking establishment of some sort — perhaps there were three of them, although it wasn’t clear if each of the three had a distinct religion, or if perhaps two of them had the same religion, with just the one remaining gentleman being of a different faith. ANyway, it seems that one of them was actually a talking grasshopper, and that particular gentleman — or should I say, gentlehopper — approached the barkeep, and mentioned that he had been told, although by whom, I couldn’t say, that this particular drinking establishment had named one of their beverages after him, a fact which both puzzled and pleased him. The barkeep made an excellent retort of sorts, which certainly was amusing, I must say, although I don’t quite recall the exact wording with which he replied.
I agree with Turk that there are other industries far more deserving of this dubious distinction, but between the three choices I’d have to go with Comcast. Comcast isn’t bad because cable television is inherently bad. They’re bad for being so had at what they do. Monsanto and Ticketmaster get a bad rap for doing what they do well. Funny how no one wastes their hate on Syngenta.